October 22, 2008
Well, it is our buddy Rocky's birthday today. We went by to see his girl/kids for a little bit today but he wasn't going to be off for a while so we had to head out. It is amazing to think about the number of years we have all passed together. I have known Rocky for 9 years now. That is a huge number for me. I meet Rocky through James of course, back when we were just screwing around as we took a break from reality. I had left Derick (for about the 30th time) and James was in between Drug scenes and for a few weeeks we ended up at my house in boone just enjoying each other. At best I can say it was on and off but if I was truly honest I would say that it was a prelude to what we knew we needed to find we just didn't realize it would be with each other. Rocky became my potato man. He was this young (hell James wasn't but about 18 at the time) drunk mess of a kid who somehow became a part of family to me. Long before I realized James would be my husband, I already considered him family and this kid he had with him all the time found his way into my heart too. Rocky's a mess and always has been but he has a kind heart and treats women he respects better than most all the men I have been around. I used to have get togethers at my house and we would all get trashed and the next morning/afternoon I would get up and make the one thing I was good at, Steak, Mashed Potatos and gravy, and corn or some other veggie. After realizing that Rocky always seemed to wake up as soon as I hit the kitchen, I put him to peeling taters for me and from that day foward he was my potato man. When I was pregnant with Kenneth he moved to Lenoir with James cousin Andy and a few months later found his "Pocahontas". That would have been around the end of 2003. Rocky and LuLu have been together for about 5 years now and I won't lie and say they have a great relationship but they do have 2 beautiful little boys and they seem to find a balance some of the time. I would love to see them have the highs that James and I do. They always seem on the verge of fighting about something but they are surviving. In a lot of ways they are doing better than James and I. They have their own place, It's just a little trailor above his moms but it is nice and has room for the family. In the end I wish the two of them the best. Who is to say what couple is made for each other and which isn't. Maybe hating each other is their way of showing passion. They are both such different people from James and I. As much as James and Rocky mesh together wonderfully, they both have such huge gaps in how they see the world. I guess it says something about their friendship that they are still friends despite those things.
I worked breakfast this morning. It was so dead, I literally made $4 in tips. I had two singles and that was it. I work again tomorrow, so I am hoping for a better outlook on things. James and I aren't as far behind as we had been but keeping gas in the car and such, is hard without the tips. I am so let down by that company. Everyday there is something else that makes me agrevated. I am getting a paper this week and actually looking into other jobs. I am so darn afraid of driving that car and I let it stop me from really looking into other things but I did drive for a little while today. I drove from Russell's antiques to the base of old Beech. I killed it twice trying to get pulled out at Cranberry but I felt a little less panicky. I guess I better try to drive some this week and get more used to it. I really need to try to drive it without James in the car, I use him to tell me when to shift and where I should be and stuff and I won't always have that. It is amazing how much harder it is to learn things as you get older.
Well it is 4 days to my birthday and didn't I promise to get a dang phone for myself. I guess that was overreaching. Dosen't look like we will have the money but who knows. I might suddenly find that my family hasn't forgotten me entirely and a card show up in the mail. I don't see it happening but who knows. I did send my little sister a letter last week and i am going to try to send a note to my mom when I can. I really should sit down with a pen and paper and write to all the people I need to but every chance for relaxation I get, I put into reading instead. Who knows though, now that I am working such short hours everyday, I may get more of a chance, and atleast I will be home some to spend time with Kenneth. We worked on his homework page tonight (all about the letter I) and then read a book together and played Letter Go Fish 3 times. He is still struggling with a lot of letters but doing it as a game seems to help him some.
Kenneth's school pictures are tomorrow. I picked out a cute outfit that I think will show up good in the pictures but I am never good at that stuff. They were too dang expensive but ya gotta buy them. He is out of school Friday and then his harvest festival is Saturday night. I haven't had the chance to call Jaime and see if she is gonna be able to come or not but it would be nice. Not that I don't understand if she can't make it. I think Rocky is having a get together Saturday night so we may go by for a few minutes after James gets off work. Who knows. I am still kinda up in the air about Halloween though. I want to take Kenneth to Boone and go to the thing at Jaime's daycare but I think doing that and then driving to Lenoir the next day for her "Passion" party might stress us out moneywise a bit much. We will see though.
Well I am off to do a few dishes before James gets home so it actually looks like I achieved something today! HAHA